Week 4 was definitely easier than week 3.  I was less stressed and stopped over-analyzing every little sensation.  My good friend and pelvic floor physio Julia reminded me that sensations are good - they are a sign that the body is adapting and healing.

Exercise
I continue to be very intentional with my exercise and am following the Core Confidence Exercise Program with a few additional exercises added in.  Every morning and every evening I do 2 sets of 10-12 of all the following exercises

• kegels in a supine, bent knee position 
• pelvic tilts in a supine, bent knee position
• bridges
• clam
• bent knee lift

I also do supine butterfly with support under my thighs, stacked butterfly (also called stacked cobbler), and a thoracic rotation pose.  I have done a few cat cow here and there too.

I do these in conjunction with my red light therapy as well. (I love my OrionLT light and you can get your own here...use code KVOPNI10 to save 10%).

I walk 3-4 times a week and...

I made the decision to have prolapse surgery in late October.  I announced it early November with a bit of apprehension…. But I felt so much love and support from my community.

I let the shame of deciding to have surgery go while at the same time witnessing that others feel that same shame.  I am hoping to help others navigate the decision so they too can drop the shame.

Of course I still questioned if my decision was the right one.  I felt anxiety build in my body.

When I feel anxious, I feel it in my chest.  It is like an ache.  My heart beats faster and harder and then I feel the ache grow because I am anxious about being anxious.

Does the ache mean something?  Is it my body telling me something?  Do I really want this? 

What if things are worse?  What if it is everything I want it to be?  What if?  What if?  What If?

Listening to the Chopra Meditation app I heard a saying that stuck with me…...

My decision to have rectocele repair surgery was a BIG one and a lot of though and research and care provider consults contributed to it.  I feel a missing element of prolapse surgery is pre-hab and re-hab guidance.  I hope to help change that with the aim of preventing surgery for some and improving the outcomes of those that go ahead.  Here are some considerations for pre-op and post-op that may help you with your decision making and/or prep and recovery.

What is a rectocele?
A Rectocele is a type of prolapse indicated by the rectum bulging into the vagina. They can contribute to discomfort, difficulty voiding, feeling like ‘something is in there’, difficulty inserting a tampon or keeping it in.  They can also be asymptomatic.  Many people don’t even know they have a prolapse and the grade (1-4) of prolapse is not always indicative of the severity of or presence of symptoms.   

What is a rectocele repair?
The most common rectocele...